I have many dear friends who read this blog, many of whom do not homeschool. I would like to apologize to those who may have taken offense at my last entry, as I had no intention of making it sound as though people who do not educate their children at home are making a lesser choice, or doing something wrong. WE have chosen to homeschool for reasons that make sense to us, and because we have the ability and desire to do so. We don’t believe that parents who don’t teach their own kids have less ability, desire, or love for their kids. Everyone makes different choices for their families, and most people take their responsibilities seriously. There are always exceptions to the rules, but for the most part, that is true.
All I was doing was reminding myself why WE do this, and why I spend the time, energy, and sanity on something that few people choose to do. I also have to remind myself often why I cook from scratch, spend extra money on organic groceries, and eat animals that we raise. It’s because I think it’s important to my family. Okay, FOR my family is a better choice of words, because they don’t care one bit about most of that. Everyone makes choices about what they will do in life, and what they will spend their time and energy on, and why. Yours are different than mine. Your circumstances are different than mine, and your past is different than mine. There are reasons from my own childhood that make me want entirely different lives for my kids. Maybe I over-compensate.
The point is, we choose the path, and sometimes we need to remind ourselves why. Sometimes I want to throw in the towel! ALL of them! And let someone else do the laundry! It’s times like these that I have to take a moment, a day, a week, and rededicate my energy. I have to pray, and seek guidance, and evaluate what I’m doing, and whether it’s right for me. Or whether it’s right for the kids. Like, at the beginning of each school year in September. Then again in November, January, and March. I kid you not. I question my choices, and especially homeschooling, often, and in depth. It’s a very different lifestyle than I grew up with, than I imagined for myself, and even than I’m good at. I don’t really fit in this role, honestly. I would like to be patient, gentle-spirited, and nurturing, but I’m not. It’s just not in my natural make-up. It’s a struggle. But, despite all that, we make choices that we think are right for us, and we have no right to judge others for their own. That’s not my job, nor my intention.
I do believe that God holds us all accountable for the choices we make, and it’s our responsibility to make sure that our kids are being cared for and nourished academically and spiritually, wherever they are. That CAN be done at school and home, and IS, every day.
I hope that I have clarified my thoughts, and apologize again if they were misunderstood, or came across with a message different than what I intended. That was NOT one of my goals!
I know you don't know me very well, but I just wanted to take a minute to say thank you for opening yourself up and putting this out there. I constantly struggle with the decision to homeschool and whether or not it's the right decision for my family. When you mentioned that you question it, and then re-question it again and again, it let me know that there were others out there that did the same thing. I too am not a gentile spirited, nurturing type and homeschooling can be very challenging. Makes it kinda nice and very helpful to know I'm not alone. Thank you very much for this post.
ReplyDeleteThank you for commenting. It's not easy to put it all out there and admit it to yourself, let alone everyone else. And, I'll tell you, it's often more than a struggle! Homeschooling is definitely a labor of love, and sometimes, you have to search pretty hard to make sure you have enough love to do it! I often think to myself, like when the kids are complaining incessantly about school work, "These kids don't even REALIZE how much we sacrifice to do this!" And, they don't. But, someday they will. Then, sometimes, I actually sit them down and explain, in clear terms, how much we DO sacrifice, what I could be doing if they weren't home all day, and how much I love them. That usually ends in tears and less complaining for a while, lol. They have to realize that we are people with desires and ambitions, too, that are set aside for them. That's what mommies do, right? Whether we homeschool, or not, and it's seldom easy!
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